CHAPTER #1

 I sat staring the stars in the rooftop of my house , the night breeze as soothing as honey. Stars trying to show me the way with all the light they had.I kept staring at the phone,indeed the most idiotic invention by the homosepians ever.
Tring tring.. It was Charu. I got so lost in her thoughts that I forgot to answer.
"hello', I took the call.
"So? What have u decided'',Her voice shaky, but firm.
"umn, I need time." I was wondering what I just said.
"fine, Please don't you ever dare to call me back"
"Please listen,You know that I don't have options. I need to have this done for the one last time. they're going to burn me to ashes If I fail.
"No,It's not your fear but your greed at work.Jai, I love you but don't expect me to come back.
It's the last time we have acknowledged each other. Don't wait for me Jai. GOODBYE
And Yes! Happy Birthday Love!"
She hung up. The Darkness followed my tears! growing stronger with every sob of mine.Audioslave's  "Like a Stone" played on my ipod, making the darkness and the pessimism within me grow like a chain reaction.
I stood up, Thought of the first memory of my childhood I could remember, I thought of Mom,
Dad, Aranya, Surabhi and at last Charu.
God!That wonderful Girl,That perfect blend of beauty, innocence and all those pretty adjectives John Keats would have jot down.Perfectlly carved eyes,That stroke of Kajal worked more than VAT 69
For a moment I thought I can fight!I can overcome all those hurdles and stones on my way. I thought of going to my B'day party where everyone was waiting for me. But I was stuck in between a resolution and a  final fortunate move. When you to choose from two , it's  hard. Your Decision will either  be right or wrong, and when you're not strong enough,You try to escape.I did the same. I Closed my eyes and jumped.I thought I've escaped.I thought I won.
But life had different plans for me.
TO BE CONTINUED............

DIE@45

Sometimes you wish to erase all the memories of the past.  It's not always about love or money! Sometimes it's about the person that you were couple of months or years back. You just can't be the same again. You don't even try because you know that's impossible. This story is about a boy who wanted to continue his life the way it was going. But Dear God! You clever player! You enjoy the most painful agonies of humans. The more they suffer, better it's going. They say worse things can happen. I say off course they can ! but do they really need to occur?
It's the story of a boy, his resolution, his success, love and his ways to revert his  past.
Welcome to the first of its kind -An online novel series.
Starting today, It will be published every Saturday. Stay tuned and enjoy.
Hope you like the concept and the novel too.
And Yeah! Don't forget his resolution!           

                                                           Die@45

The Girl.The Night.The City

This rainy night and thoughts of you
the sky is tearing for the moon 
Me for you.
Stars sometimes flicker like the hopes within me.
walking with a shiver in the rain,
can't you see??
This beautiful night, this world of my own.
I Would love to walk this road with u
I'm only walking to destine alone.
Let it rain,Drench me with Euphoria.
I'll get all wet,I have my thoughts of you.
All I have is a thought of her,The perfect Girl.

There she was in her own thoughts,In her own Place.
In a place she knows the best,Why care about the rest?
Her Obsession says it all,One city that'll never fall.
She was perfect like a fairy tale,
I mirrored a sob story.
Like a glass of wine,She gleamed,
Soothing like a twilight breeze.
The Adjective to life!
I could Jaunt into her eyes,
Deep as the sea she loved,Bright as the city lights.
Wish I had known to fall for a soul,
It's the face that I fell for.
Summon me to your city,Sort out my odds,
We'll meet like fairy tale,We'll disappear to moon.

Look into my eyes,Question my anxiety,
Stare at my face,Why is it parched?
This bag of bones zests,Its surrounded by Clans.
Heart dwells alone,It's confused and cries.
Seems like the air is a Bane, Curses me with every breath,
I don't care now,I'm in your city now.
In a place you know the best,I won't care about the rest.
I won't regret my move,
I'm in a city that'll never fall.

City that Never Sleeps

I thought of completing this poem but i never will!

Last Poem. But wasn't able to Refrain from publishing it.

I'm on my way to better days! 

No pessimistic poems now onwards . 

Frame a disengaged place

none to worry you,none to worry about

every drop of rotgut will please.

Penthos will be summoned,

You can ask to clarify,

His comeuppance will be decided.

We can build a city of our own.

Other's yearning to enter

We won't allow twinge seekers.

We'll buil a city of our own

City that never sleeps,

A place that never blubbers.

I'll never walk back the boulivard to home,

Home is nothing but an illusion of joy.

Let's collectively burn our dreams.

Let's plant new seeds.

New dreams to live,

No mistakes repeated.

We'll live a life again,

New battles to fight again.

And this all will take place,

In the City that never sleeps,

A place that never blubbers.

1. 
   

The Poet

Obsess me with anything.

don't leave me to grieve.

for what has been done.

don't leave me to write,

My story.

For this world is a stage of drama,

No characters fake,scenes unscripted.

Audienced by everyone but you.

Cry with tears,they call you weak!

Do it with words, they'll call u poet.

I'm not ruined yet,

Its still not over!

I still write little lame,

My life isn't a full game,yet.

I'll burn my past to ashes,

I won't acknowledge clashes,

Its Darkest before dawn,

My morning is on its way,

Trapped in the shadow.

Lost in the echoes.

I'll wait for it,

I won't cry.Because,

Cry with tears,they call you weak!

Do it with words, they'll call u poet

I swear,

Nothing else matters but you,

You are the crux.

But,Its not just you

I'm moving away, from  all

close to me!

Surrender yourself to me! 

It Hardly matters now

Strangers acknowledge me better now,

acquaintances don't intrest me.

Ask me to fight,I'll battle to loose!

Cry with tears,they call you weak!

Do it with words, they'll call u poet

I'm in a long sleep.

wake me up!

oh wait! let me dream.

I'm bemused. Why endure?

Why loose hope? Either!

Let this canvass go on,

Let this pen carry on.

Cry with tears,they call you weak!

Do it with words, they'll call u poet

I'm a poet I guess.

The Man Who Sold His Dream

LET'S meet again, the way we want to.

lets travel again, the road we wish to.

for i have nothing left, i could dream about

i dream of having a dream,someday

yearning to fulfill it,everyday

I'm the man who sold his dream.

You're the one who bought it.

we'll start from the very begining.

I'll think of a reason, to survive.

Well, I'll at least,Pretend.

Show me the way to restart.

Tell me its Impossible.

I have all the reasons to love you.

You have a lot to hate me

Coz I'm the man who sold his dream

but you're the one who bought it.

we have our options.

You  have a reason to smile

I'll find mine to mourn.

your soul is illuminated

My heart is crepuscule.

We can never meet.

Wish we could.

Why would you want to encounter me?

Coz I'm the man who sold his dream

but you're the one who bought it.

You definetly are fine, My past.

You have lived ur age, N left me in gloom.

You were a glorious time, I used to be alive then.

Breathing ain't living,

Sobbing ain't mourning.

I'll remember you ,But you won't.

Coz I'm the man who sold his dream

but you're the one who bought it.

Odyssey of Life

A Walk’s all I want,I’ll traipse,

I’m afraid.

Journies dont consternate me now.

Boulevards so huddled,aplomb’s gashed,

too.

I keep wringing,why endure?

Futile it will be, had been sure.

I Dreamt,Zinged for a while.

I looked, I lived for a while

This afterglow just don’t suffice,

to drag me forward, To walk in caliginous

to walk will be a burden, to rest will be a sin.

no! i wont walk, i walk rest either!

I wont die, i’m not living either.

sometimes when i talk, sometimes when i lie,

Sometimes when i live , I’m begrudged to LIE

I’m not a lier, I’m an Introvert

I’m not a bad person, Only have a bad luck!

How can I justify?My each n every botch.

And I’m begrudged to lie !

I’m forced to walk.

And I traipse,

Never wanted to harbor,

Ever tried to?

Where is my harbour?

To where should I sail?

But,

A Walk’s all I want.

Wayfarer Of Dark

And I, Sit here in Dark,

Alone.

Darkness of Sun, Don’t you know?

The People around,are so dumbstruck,

How am I Alone? with them by my side.

But I,

I’m all alone 

I’m all alone

I’m all alone

coz you’re not next to me.

Like horizon, We seem to meet,

Never really do!

Do we?

Then I, Walk this boulevard,

envisaged that I’ll see you

And I

End up to you,

Amble then Run.

To you

Whisper then Shout.

Your Name.

And then, You come to me.

Bliss and Love

in your eyes..

Then we

KISS.

And I woke up,

This night ,at your grave

I’ll come again,

Tomorrow!

Coz I,

I’m all alone 

I’m all alone 

I’m all alone coz you’re not next to me.

Dear Life!

Dear Life

Lets go! 

Take a walk

Let’s sort out

the odds

I won’t cry,

you wont curse me either

I’ll refrain from a war,

Don’t gift me battles either.

But

Dear Life, 

You’re gonna kill me

You’re gonna kill me

You’re Gonna kill me

In the End.

OH Life,

We fought, killed ‘em all

Love,Pain,You but me.

Oh 

We had

Some shitty hours,

They call it Love,Joy,Elation and

Happiness.

But

Dear Life

You ‘re gonna kill me,

You’re gonna bury me,

You’re gonna lynch me 

In the end.

Convince Me, It’ll last.

Every breath I smoke is a debt on my death,

the way I die every second, I debt my life!

each moment of sorrow is bliss,

every moment of joy is sick!

tell me if its a phase,

convince me it’ll last!

i’ll pact with joys,

we’ll part our ways!

there’s nothing left to loose,

so why this fear?

there’s nothing to achieve,

never been so clear!

all alone on the brink of joy,

nowhere to go,

noone to follow!

drag me somewhere,

push me to limits,

bless me with agony,

keep me alive to suffer!

let this life go on,

let’s see who looses it all

tell me if its a phase,

convince me it’ll last.